My mom loves to be outside in her garden. Ever since I can remember, she's been planting flowers in our front and back yard.
Last summer, she helped me plant these beautiful begonias in my backyard. After we planted them, I thought we were done and started to walk back inside. But my mom made me spend another 10 minutes pinching off any dead or dying buds.
Why? Because any part of the plant that is not actively blooming takes away energy. The flowers are not as full, fragrant, or beautiful.
So how is taking care of a garden remotely similar to relationships?
Most of us have spent our time hanging out, passing time, dating, (or whatever else we want to call it) with a person who was taking energy away from us being 100% happy.
We make excuses.
We stay because it is "better" than being alone.
We stay because we are comfortable.
We stay because we are scared.
We stay because we don't want to hurt their feelings.
We stay because we haven’t found the right one.
We stay because we are hoping that by loving a person, we will "love them" into loving us.
As long as we are directing our energy toward love that is not flourishing, our love life can’t bear the fruit or flowers we want.
So the next time, you say, I’ll just hold on to them until I find something new, think about the flowers in your own garden. Are you placing your time, energy, and focus on someone who is preventing you from growing something beautiful?